As I write this story, I truly hope that it inspires many more to do more and more Seva!
I passed out of Stephens with sour memories – my friends had left me and my career was nothing to boast of. I wanted to meet Guruji so that He could give me some guidance and I would get out of my mess, the mess that was more in the mind. There were too many things that I desired, but my hands were empty. I knew not what to do and how to do. I was a lost soul then. Finally, I decided to meet Sri Sri at the Ashram during Navratri. But what followed was not something I had planned or wanted. Guruji constantly ignored me. He just did not look my way. I wondered why. I had tonnes of encounters with Him, but all in vain. Forget talking to me, He did not even look at me. All my questions were unanswered, all my confusions doubled.
I returned to Delhi with utter sadness. A week later, I went for a YES!+ follow up session with Atika didi. While she was inspiring all the young YES!+ folks to do Seva, she quoted Guruji, stating that if we did His work, He would take care of our work. I felt those words were only for me, as though it was my Masters’ message to my situation. From that very moment, I adamantly decided to give my prime time to His work, with the hope that He would take care of me and my career.
I soon realized that I was already a part of the UTSAV team (a special YES!+ Program, planned to be organized on a huge scale), and that year was an epic year for all the volunteers , for we witnessed a massive change in Delhi. 5000 youth had experienced the YES!+ program. It was a big achievement. The mere sight of watching the new participants’ blossom in knowledge, itself, empowers you. It makes you realize that you are much more than your desires, you are much more than your mistakes, YOU are LOVE! It is a beautiful feeling, trust me.
I then realized that I was simply addicted to Seva. It gave me this high that I had never felt before, and I definitely did not want to let go. I wanted to drown myself in my Masters’ work. And so, I continued on this path for the whole year. I did five Advance courses, I did the Blessings course and assisted many teachers. The whole year passed blissfully. And in the end, I had grown immensely, and all my erstwhile miseries had probably dissolved somewhere. I was a new person, so strong, so confident, so empowered.
I still remember, my IIT-JAM paper was just 20 days away. But I had not prepared enough for it. I was lagging way behind, as compared to the other students. According to my tutor, I was 9 months behind schedule (Students usually take a year off only preparing for this competitive paper). But I never panicked; I simply accepted my situation and decided to give it my 100% for the next 20 days till the exam.
What happened in the examination hall was truly thrilling, and the results were even more amusing, for I had passed my examination with a rank of 81. It was unbelievable.
That year was truly a year of fulfillment and enrichment, not because I made it to IIT Delhi, but because all my bitterness had turned into pure love, all my anxieties and desires had turned into surrender, and the knowledge had dawned upon me that I am here for others, all the skills that I have, are for the service of others. The real secret of happiness is that it comes back to you a hundred times more, once you begin to share it with others. It’s a simple law of nature.
I can never forget how the year had come to a beautiful end. I was sitting besides my Master, enjoying the chocolates given by Him and keenly listening to Him speak. He often says that we usually do what ‘we want’ to do, but what ultimately happens is ‘what HE’ wants, BUT, the day we begin to do what ‘HE’ really wants us to do, then what ‘we want’ will automatically begin to happen. Try it out☺